corkymalorky

Homophobic Racist Prejudiced In love

Apology to my friend To whom I am so promising to and full of blind hope Into the inevitable beyond I cannot say I have been sure To you and any love of mine I cannot give you clarity Only that there is love in me But is that enough to keep your peace Knowing I am a tease But only of a lesser mind For I will hurt you and commit such crimes Because I like to press rewind Or watch the feast devour our kind For I lack logic and wish on faith And you Who may rely On your fingers crossed I am a trick of such a trade that creates pretense as a form of aid I try to fade Yet I am like a cockroach And I may recede behind the bars

One day I will be brave And I will say all the things I wish to say To you and to your face One day I will be whole I will be strong I will not falter When I take the leap You will not see another Flicker of despair I cannot stand another Moment of hesitation From my breaking face Resolute I assure you It will be today

See I wanted to write about life because I feel sorry for myself and the fact that most days I can't remember why I'm still thinking, or why I bother to make faces or eat the food on my plate when I can't  taste it. Manong roly says it's time to eat, and maybe so it is. But what if it's time to quit? Can I? No I don't think I'm allowed to, how ungrateful would I be? But if I can't feel what I'm feeling, if it's shameful for me t be weak and to feel strongly about something that makes me feel less alone, then, maybe I should quit. Maybe I shouldn't be human, maybe I ought to just die, because I am weak in certain situations and I don't know ho

How to be safe From pain Is a stupid manual For the stupid man "Oh, Hello abundance I haven't met you lately I think I'll be better If you hug me Because I'm pathetic" Sink your ass into some perfume And be loved Bullshit is all can say Of how you give effort Amounting to nothing "Oh how fun" Oh how fucked Go roll in the mud Like a pig in the sun It sickens me How happy you are Being an artifice

I'm lost because I'm in this place I can easily find. It's not good to be in a situation like this because I end up feeling deprived of good experiences, I feel repressed, and uneasy and my body collapses into dust. Rotting away into nothing but another dead body bulldozed over for a hospital construction. I'm angry at myself. I'm angry at my incapacity dettach history from my mind and restart and commit. I'm afraid to finish after all that work, like i have no means of seeing a good end to a good job. Living is a big joke sometimes because my mind can't stop finding how ridiculous it can get. I need to laugh in order to stop emoting. Enterta

Empty your mind of all sensations, sounds, emotions. Empty your mind of paralyzing thoughts. Be still, for In this moment you do not matter. You do not exist, you are nobody. Say nothing, be nothing, be absent. The world does not expect anything of you, so forget yourself. You have no ego to fulfill or contracts to sign; you are alone. You have nobody. You are free. Get lost within the confines of your mind. When it is vast and empty like the desert in which you encounter your god, these are the moments in which you discover yourself. Empty yourself of the world completely for 3 minutes, and believe me when I tell you, that you will be filled

Spread your wings feel you up by the swings keep your shirt snowfall dirt By the bench keep the wench heal your heart it's all in French Most are days Sunny yays moistened lips Myster slips he's got blood on his shirt most of all a bit of dirt quite a fall down the drain sunny days no more pain pitch that tent keep your heart quite intent to imagine heaven sent him for a break in make or break it It's my time I think I'll make it Most of all try your best It's all you're worth Just this pile It's how I satisfy Just don't tell me I can't fly In 2 years With a smile

I am in eternal labor. Pregant with pause With a silent deer hunter That gives birth to a cause They come out in singles Doubles and in groups As many as kittens and tadpoles and stars Every one of them Smoking cigars We are all dusty with dew We are all easy to love Easy to enter Easy to grow We are who we are We are most sincere We all echo…echo… It seems like I've spoken but I'm just a broken machine Time is not a test It drips away at a pace you can't find And it is often abused We must never forget: We are all damaged goods and that forgiveness repairs the time machine

See the rebel Had a cause And we, who think ourselves good live without reason mission or freedom We will leave this room agreeable and "so nice" Lips on more asses Is the method to win I hope not